Wasting time

I promised myself that I would tackle some of the boxes of books at the store today. So I'm going to blog for a bit instead. :D

I had a counseling appointment this morning, and we were talking about all the things that have been happening for the last while that contribute to stress. I never think about it, but seeing a psychologist's jaw drop while you list off things puts it into perspective, lol! No wonder I've had problems with stress! I mean, not everything is bad but even good stress is stress, right?

So here's my list for the last 7 years:
-picked up stakes and moved to a town 6 hours away from friends and family
-had hubby's friend move in with us (was supposed to be temporary)
-culture shock of going from a city to a town, plus the large francophone influence
-hubby took a pay cut because it was supposed to be cheaper to live here
-I finally got a full time job-as a Customer Service Rep for a cellphone company
-bought a duplex
-my parents moved into the other apartment in the duplex
-got full time custody of the kid (she was 9)
-got promoted and started working 60 hours a week
-first major bout of panic attacks and agoraphobia-had to be off work and never managed to return
-Bear had a stroke
-Bear's father died
-went back to university full time, which eventually triggered another bad bout of anxiety
-the poor kid had major issues with her mother and her mother's new live-in guy
-Bear's mother died
-bought a bookstore
-major health issues with my sinuses and allergies to antibiotics
-the summer from hell with health and anxiety and agoraphobia
-I had two uncles die over the summer, one expected and one a shock
-Bear came very, very close to successfully committing suicide

!

So when I take a step back, it's no wonder I've been stressed out. What is a wonder is that I'm still here, still mostly functional and I'm not an alcoholic or a druggie.

The counselor said something today about me having great inner strength, and I laughed because I never think of myself as strong at all. I tend to view myself as weak. He pointed out that any one of these major life events by itself is tremendously stressful; we've been averaging 2 a year or so.

Then he said something that I know I'll be pondering for some time to come. He said "It's the strong people that realize they need help and reach out for it. The weak ones never get help." That is such a departure from the way that I think that I do believe it might be a life-changing statement for me.

And it might well be a life-changer for Bear, too. He is seeing a shrink right now (obviously) but she's mostly interested in meds. He's finally mulling over seeing a counselor to talk out all the stuff he keeps bottled up inside. When I shared the idea that it's the weak people that don't get help when they need it, he looked surprised and then embarrassed a bit. I hope it was an eye-opener for him.

Gotta love it when my counseling turns into a two for one deal!